The Joke Thread

Discussion relating to anything not football related

Re: The Joke Thread

Postby lidbid46 » Thu Apr 15, 2021 6:03 pm

A Priest, an Iman and a Rabbit are sent for to give blood. First in is the Rabbit. The Doctor asks him what his blood type is. 'I think I must be a type O' he replied!
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Re: The Joke Thread

Postby gillsfan1066 » Thu Apr 15, 2021 7:53 pm

I knew there was a reason this part of the site was NOT a good idea, hahaha. Just joking. Hows Mrs L ?
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Re: The Joke Thread

Postby lidbid46 » Sun Apr 18, 2021 1:16 pm

Perfectly fine thanks, since she managed to get her legs shaved for the first time since lockdown.
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Re: The Joke Thread

Postby gillsfan1066 » Sun Apr 18, 2021 10:42 pm

Haahahahahaha ,what a woman , well at least old Mammoth legs keeps you warm in the winter , no need for pajama bottoms , on her I mean,not you.
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Re: The Joke Thread

Postby CadburyMan » Tue Apr 20, 2021 4:47 pm

I was in a restaurant the other night and ordered Chickem Napoleon for the first time, when it came there was no meat; just the carcass.

I said,"what's this?" The waitress replied , "its the boney part"
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Re: The Joke Thread

Postby CadburyMan » Wed Apr 21, 2021 8:34 am

I went to the doctors and said doctor I can't stop eating snooker balls.
Doctor ask what do you eat for breakfast.?
I said one yellow ball one brown ball and red ball.
Ok said the doctor, what do you eat for lunch?
I said I eat two reds one blue and a pink ball.
Doctor ask and for supper what do you eat?
I said 3 red balls one yellow one blue one pink one black ball.
The doctor says I can clearly see your problem,


>


>


>


your not getting enough greens
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Re: The Joke Thread

Postby CadburyMan » Tue Apr 27, 2021 9:12 am

Just showed my wife a photograph of me with the band REM. She said,"which one are you?"

I replied, "that's me in the corner".

She then asked me, " when we go to Egypt on holiday can we go on a camel?"

My answer was, " don't be stupid; it will take far too long to go on a camel."
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Re: The Joke Thread

Postby lidbid46 » Thu Apr 29, 2021 7:01 pm

So I had some bad news today. A good friend of mine has been struck off after one minor discretion. He slept with a patient, just once, and now can't do the job he loves and spent seven years training for. He's a lovely guy, genuinely cares about his work and is a brilliant vet!
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Re: The Joke Thread

Postby CadburyMan » Thu Apr 29, 2021 9:18 pm

Just finished reading Agatha Christie's Murder on the Buses.

Turns out Butler did it !
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Re: The Joke Thread

Postby CadburyMan » Fri May 07, 2021 2:24 pm

A couple of weeks ago, I bought one of those Queen mattresses. Now I'm getting shivers down my spine, body's aching all the time.
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